Halloweeeeeeen Weekend

Its Halloween weekend already! Wow time flies way too fast.
Saturday we had Mr. Blue's birthday party. Kayden had a blast! He kept getting super pissed at me because I wouldn't let him swim by himself. He will be such a good swimmer though! He already kicks his legs really well!
Sunday we went to my sisters for lunch, games and pumpkin carving. I had to leave early because I had a horrible migraine. I don't think I've ever had one that bad.
We got home, I fed Kayden, and we went to bed at 7:30. He woke up a lot because we went to bed early but I felt SO much better when we woke up this morning.
Today is my last assessment at the LI. I'm grateful for a little bit of money. Of course its going straight to bills but its better than nothing.
Tonight we're going trick-or-treating. Kayden is going as spider man. I didn't prepare much for his outfit. He won't remember anyways and I'm broke. So we're taking what we can get :) I'm sure he'll have a blast though :)
I'm hoping tomorrow is still a good day. Going to bed that early felt SO good. I think I'll do it again tomorrow.
I love my stinky bear so much. He is getting so big and is such an amazing person. <3

Halloween Weekend!

Life is good.
This is Kayden's first Halloween where he can trick or treat!
I think he's going as a dinosaur. Costumes are so expensive. Plus he doesn't care what he's going as.
Tonight I think we are going trunk or treating at church, then tomorrow is Mr. Blue's birthday! Woot Woot!
Kayden loves to swim and loves his cousins so it will be a blast.
Monday I think we are going trick or treating with Charly & Jeff. It will be a blast. Hopefully it won't be too cold.
Tuesday I have an open house at work which should be interesting. I hope we get a lot of potential clients.
I'm missing my baby boy, so I'm happy its Friday so that I can spend a lot of time with him.
I think Sunday we will just play games, and eat and read books at Charly's house. I just wanna cuddle and watch movies with him, but he's too much of an explorer for that.
I have 4 papers, 4 discussion questions, 6 tests, and a billion other things to do that I've been procrastinating on but oh well. I'll get it done. Hopefully I'll get a better grade on my next English paper. I'm not doing so hot in that one.
Other than all that, life is good. My bills are paid once again this month which is always an accomplishment.
I have a lot to be grateful for. I need a lot but I have a lot and am grateful for everything.
Most of all I have my son, who is the most amazing person on the planet.

Starting to Stress

Whats new? When am I not stressed?

School is kicking my butt. Normally I rock at writing essays but for some reason I keep doing something wrong. I made in A in English last year so I'm not quite sure what my deal is this year.

I have like 3 essays due next week and my brain feels like its about to explode.

Thank god I have a boss that doesn't care if I do schoolwork because if I didn't, I'd be failing right now.

I got the Dean's Scholarship. Its not a lot, but it felt good to know that I actually got it.

Kayden slept until 8:15 this morning which equals like 11 to non-parent people LOL.

He is such a smart boy. He brings you books constantly to read and understands the way things work on a level I can't believe.

His cousin's birthday is this weekend at the pool in Kingfisher. I'm pretty excited. Kayden loves swimming and Mr. Blue is warming up to me :) He actually gives me kisses now! About time its been a frickin year!

I am relieved that after this next paycheck I'll have K's daycare paid up until February. I hate being broke.

Life is good though.  I can't complain too much. I have an amazing family, an amazing son, and maybe one day I'll have amazing friends also.

Oh the joys of being responsible

I love it when I read posts on facebook about how horrible it is for these teens/young adults to have to buy their own clothes, or food, or even pay for gas. Just to give you a good idea of my bills without food or diapers, its well over 1600 a month. I don't even make 1600 a month. Yea I bet you're thinking "how does she afford food" I don't. Whats even better? I don't qualify for food stamps. Ha yea, I know crazy right?
I guess that makes me feel good though. At least I don't have my mommy, daddy, or the government taking care of me and my child. There is that small amount of pride that gives me a small glimmer of hope when I check my bank account and there is just barely enough to buy Kaydens food.
So, quit complaining you had to fill up your gas tank when mommy and daddy pay for your rent, utilities, food, insurance, and necessities.
Anywho had to get that off my chest
This weekend I got awarded the Dean's Scholarship at school. I'm pretty stoked about that. Making good grades really does pay off!
Kayden has HORRIBLE allergies that are making him miserable. I feel so bad for the poor guy. He can barely breathe. Its hard not to be annoyed at 6 a.m. though. I'm going to have to figure out some good medications so he can breathe and let me sleep.
Life is good. Bills are paid.
Can't complain too much ;)

Girls Night Hayyyyy

Tonight is girls night hayyy!
I'm excited to go out with my mom, sister, step niece? friends and their friends :)
We're going to the Redneck Yacht Club. I've never been but I've heard from reviews that its pretty cool.
I'm gonna miss my stinky bear a ton but he will be having fun with daddy.
I've paid up 2 months of Kayden's daycare, which rocks, and now I just have to get my tag and new license and I'm caught up on the things I need to take care of.
Hopefully in the next 2 months I'll figure out how to pay for January's daycare before Tax Return time so that I can pay for like 6 months of that.
Kayden likes brushing his teeth I've notices. He likes being like mommy. He is such a big boy now! Its bittersweet to its truest definition.
He woke up and sat on the couch like a big boy and let mommy get ready without throwing a fit!
He almost ate all of his oatmeal and didn't cry when I dropped him off at daycare!
Tomorrow we will probably go to my dads to pick some stuff up and then my dad is supposed to help me with my paper. I didn't notice how flawed it was till he looked at it so I need some serious help.
This weekend should be fun :)

SO irritating

Today started off alright, I went to The Lynn Institute for my assessment and they forgot to schedule it so I have to go back tomorrow. They gave me and extra 25 bucks so I guess its OK.
I get to work, eat and I'm just sitting here when I remember that I need to call and check on the documents at Childtime and make sure they are ready for me. They aren't and I have 10 days to settle it or I owe 300 bucks that I don't freaking have.
Then I remember that my Dog Bite case STILL isn't settled and I get irritated so I walk over to my lawyer's office and he won't answer the door.
Its been like a year. I'm starting to get really pissed off.
So I start watching my US history videos. Its boring but whatever its school ya gotta do it, except that the freaking professor takes FOREVER to make one SMALL point. It takes him like 15 minutes to explain something he could have explained in 2.
Its just beyond irritating. So now I can't concentrate, and I'm super sleepy.
On the plus side, since I went to TLI (the lynn institute) I am able to pay for 2 months of daycare which takes a HUGE load off of my back that I have been stressing the hell out about.
Now I might be able to buy food. Hopefully.
I am so stressed with so many papers, midterms, and discussion questions and trying to figure out HOW I'm going to do nursing school, clinicals, and work and still see my baby.
Gahh I hate days where I'm stressed out.
Overall though, I can't complain too much.
My sister, mom, and friends are going out tomorrow which I'm excited about so it will be nice to have a girls night.
:)

Well that was interesting

Well, I am at work again :)
I spent the last 24 hours at the Lynn Institute. They paid me some good money for not a lot of work.
I went in, they did my vitals, did a physical, did an emotional assessment, then took me to my room. It looked like a hotel room with a nice huge bed, a tv, and free wifi. They bought me Panera for lunch, and Outback for dinner. It was a pretty sweet deal. I go back for 3 more visits. I get 100$ at each visit. I need the money SOOOOOOO bad. Christmas, birthdays, daycare, and bills has made me broke as a joke. I can't wait until Tax Return season.
I am going to buy a swing set, pay off my car, put money in savings, put money into K's daycare, put a dp on a car, and buy K lots of toys/clothes.
I am going to apply to nursing school in the spring. I'm pretty excited. I'm praying they will give me night/weekend clinicals because there is NO way I can do it during the day.
I missed my stinky bear so much. I went home this morning to see him before I headed to work and he looked SO excited to see mommy. He freaked out if I left the room. I love that he knows me and misses me so much.
He is the sweetest most amazing baby boy on the planet <3

A day in the life

Soooo, this weekend was OK.
Kayden was SOO crabby yesterday it was unbelievable. But my sweet sister pointed out he was bloated really bad, so I felt bad for losing my patience with him. He's such a cute little goober though. This morning he got SO mad at me for not laying in bed cuddling with him after we woke up lol. We were running late or else I so would have. Its always my favorite thing when he wants to cuddle. Melts my heart.
My cute nephew Mason and I bonded a lot this weekend. HE IS SO CUTE. He gave me tons of kisses (which he's never done) and he kept crawling to me to hold him. I love the little stinker. Him and Kayden played really well together. Even though they are both in the "mine" stage, they manage to share a little bit.
I missed E's soccer game which I was so sad about. Apparently there is a bully on the other team who pushed E. Made me wanna cry. But lil E pushed him back! I'm so proud :) LOL.
School is finally starting to get better now that I am actually applying myself. My history lecturer makes me wanna blow my head off though. He is a Democrat, and pushes his opinions even though he says he is being "unbiased" yea whatever.
I did my essay on FLDS & LDS and I think I'll get a good grade, at least I hope I will get a good grade.
Life is pretty good, I go in tomorrow at the Lynn Institute for the overnight visit. I'm nervous about leaving K, but he will have fun with daddy.
Life is good, money keeps finding its way to me so I can pay my bills thank god.
Can't wait till tax return season geeze.

Things I love, and things I don't love so much about Kayden being 1

Don't get me wrong,
I wouldn't change being a mom for ANYTHING in the world,
But there are some things,
I wish that 1 year olds couldn't do.
This blog was inspired by another one I saw the other day.

Things I'm not so fond of:

• They don't like to eat what you make, I mean come on, mac & cheese is delicious, banana's are too. Just eat what I make you!
• They throw fits about EVERYTHING. Sometimes it truly is funny, but when you are trying to pee early in the morning and you don't want them flushing the toilet, its hard to laugh at them while they throw their body on the ground and scream like they are dying.
• The whole, spitting food out on to the ground, or when it gets imbetween the high chair and their butt. Its all squishy and gross.
• When they throw food on the ground. If you don't want it, just don't eat it please.
• The need to put disgusting things in their mouths. Like: dirt, bugs, toilet paper, stirafome, paper, receipts, shoes, socks, or old food.

Things that I absolutely LOVE:

• His huge overly slobbery kisses. He opens his mouth as wide as possible for kisses. Then he gives you a big fat slobbery one. You can't help but smile. It melts my heart, seriously.
• He dances when ANY song comes on tv, or the radio. He stomps his feet, spins in a circle, does a couple squats, and dances.
• His hugs. When he first wakes up in the morning, all he wants to do is cuddle. He lays his head down on your shoulder, and pats you. It is the sweetest thing ever.
• He loves dogs. Like, he has a serious obsession with them. He kisses clifford in his books.
• He loves guitars. Even if he sees one on a shirt he tries to strum the strings.
• He loves his cousins. Every single time he sees them, he runs up and gives them a kiss. He isn't always good at sharing, but when he does, it is the sweetest thing to watch.
• His facial expressions. I swear funniest thing EVER. He does this monkey face, that just cracks me up.
• His laugh. If I just blow my face up a little bit, he bursts out in this amazing laugh that you just can't help but smile.
• He is so stinkin SMART! He knows what socks, shoes, pants, kisses, hugs, bye bye, & shirts are. He knows where things go, he puts them back if you ask, he brings things to you, he loves to read, he loves to learn.
• He just started signing, "more". So amazing! He is so stinkin smart, I swear.
• He loves strawberries. Like LOVES them. He tries to stuff like 5 in his mouth at once. I kid you not.
• Watching him eat a banana is like watching a starving child eat a cheeseburger. He takes HUGE bites. Like, I swear, he takes a 3 inch bite. Funniest thing.
• He knows what "lay down" means. He lays right next to you, gives you a kiss, and cuddles right up to you.
• Even though he's a little old for it, he still has a paci, but he knows what it is, and looks for it.
• He plays Peek A Boo.
• His smile is the most precious thing ever.
• His little toofers.
• He bobs his head to music. Especially guitars. He KNOWS the sound of a guitar distinctly from another instrument.
• He plays with other kids, and it is so fun to watch.
• He loves his family. He always goes right up to them, lays his head on their lap, and gives them kisses.

There may be some long days, long nights, some things I'm not so fond of, But there are more than twice as many things I love about my son. His spirit is so pure, so innocent, and so precious. I wouldn't change being his mom for ANYTHING in the entire world.

A new week

Its been a long week already.
Monday Kayden and I got super sick. We threw up all night long and didn't eat anything on Tuesday. Poor baby was so sick. I slept all day Tuesday while Kevin took care of Kayden. I'm feeling a lot better today but my stomach is still messed up.
My dad is giving me an entire bedroom set this weekend! I'm super excited! I've never had an entire set! Its a king size too! I don't know how its going to fit! LOL.
Kayden is amazing as usual. He is so stinkin smart. He knows to bring you things, he points to different animals in a book and shakes his head yes or no if he is hungry :)
I love his kisses. Even though they are slobbery, they are the most heart melting thing on the earth.
I'm picking up my grades in all my classes and I'm so happy because I was so worried I wouldn't pass. I'm still a little worried but I think I will be OK!
My sister and I are going to apply for the nursing program at Rose State soon! I'm super excited and you don't have to take chemistry!
The only thing I'm worried about is if I have to take any time off of work. I can't afford to and I don't wanna put my job on the back burner after everything my boss has done for me.
I go in next week for a 24 hr visit at the Lynn Institute. I really need the money and I'm grateful that I got approved to do the study.
Life is pretty good otherwise. Looking super forward to my cute nephews birthday party in a little over a week! He's growing so fast and him and kayden play so well together...most of the time ;) Its so cute to watch them kiss each other and play together, then steal the toys from each other!
Life is good.
I need to start posting more to make a good grade!

AAh more for English class

I've gotta keep up on this blog or I won't get a good grade!
So I'll start off with this weeks adventures.
Tuesday I got to watch 3 hot OGE guys come in and work around my house. That is always fun! I also got a brand new FREE refrigerator.
Yesterday we went to outback (YUM!) for my niece Taylor's birthday. She turned 11 and got a Ipad thingy. Its pretty cool!
Last night my Oma brought over Pierre (dog), for me to watch while she is out of town.
Kayden is OBSESSED with dogs. I mean like, ridiculously obsessed. He woofs non stop at the dog. It is hilarious. He loves to pet them.
His fits are slowing. Thank goodness. I honestly just don't know what to do with myself when he throws a fit.
He is such a cute little stinker though.
Saturday my dad is taking me grocery shopping. Kayden and I will probably go help him and Pam bag pretzels afterwards.
I think I'm gonna wait until January to buy a new car. I don't know how I'm going to afford new monthly payments or even get a decent car but I'm going to have to try. My transmission won't last forever so I have to figure something out.
I'm hoping I get a raise in the next couple of months to help make ends meet.
Since DHS sucks hardcore and asks you how much money you make BEFORE taxes and counts that as your income. I mean come on people, that is NOT how much money is in my pocket. Who came up with that retarded rule anyway. I really wanna smack them right about now.
So I'm now 200-250 in deficit every month. Hopefully Kevin can keep helping me out or else I will be screwed.
Tomorrow I'm going to go interview for a clinical trial for depression. It pays 800 bucks. Which will get me by for a little while. I just have to keep coming up with new ways to get extra income.
I sold a couple of things off Amazon to make a few ends meet this month but I need to find more. I'm starting to really really worry.
I know that everything will work out in the end. God has a plan for me and my little man so I just have to keep doing my best and hope he has plans to help me soon. Until then, I will just try more and more everyday to do better and be better.
Can't wait for the weekend to hang with my little man <3